The Eddie Kranepool Society

Saturday, January 10, 2004

I was content to stay home tonight, but my wife and kids wanted to go out for dinner. Sure 10 degrees with a wind chill of zero, why don't we go down to the beach and have a picnic? I say "ok, Let's go, but I pick the place. I could see the panic in their eyes because the know we going to a place with meat, potatoes and football on TV. So I pick the Colonade. All of my Staten Island readers know this place. We get a nice booth right near a TV with the Panthers-Rams game. I have a steak and I watch the OT and a Panther win. Life is great! Now we get in the car to go home so I can watch the Pats-Titans in the comfort of my 72 degree house. Of course I switch on the FAN (do we have to listen to this crap all the time?.... uh yeah!) Then the evening takes a turn for the worst. My guy, great Mets fans, great basketball announcer, Bob Hussler comes and says: "Vladimir Guerrero has turned down the Mets offer, and will sign with a surprise team tomorrow.....more details later on WFAN". Well, you would have thought that steak I just ate came from a Mad Cow. Jesus H. Christ! How could this be! How did he get away? So now instead of digesting a wonderful meal, I'm mainlining Maalox. Goddamit, do we Mets fans ever catch a friggin' break? Screw that Bambino Bastard, you want to talk about a curse, THE METS ARE CURSED!!!!!!!! Think about it. Wilpon, Steve Phillips and Bobby Valentine go up to Massachusetts to see Mo Vaughn. Vaughn has not played in 2 years, coming off a ruptured bicep. He's as big as Patriots NT Ted Washington, well over 300 lbs. Our Three Musketteers say"Yep, he's worth the money. How much about $45 mil left on that contract? A Bag of Shells, we'll take em. The Indians call and say "would you like Robbie Alomar"? Uh... Yes "how much"? Oh Matt Lawton and Billy Traber and couple of rosin bags. Gee for a Hall of Fame 2nd baseman? Sure, where do I sign? Cliff Floyd? torn Achilles. Tom Glavine? Ques-Tech. Armando Benitez? Pass the Maalox please. Remember Generation K?Artie from Queens? Seaver traded. Seaver lost to White Sox on waviers. Gooden and Strawberry in rehab. Kevin Mitchel traded. Ray Knight see ya! Lenny Dykstra to Phillies. Shea Stadium. Kahns hot dogs. With the first pick in the 1967 free agent draft the Mets select catcher Steve Chilcott and not Reggie Jackson. Now Guerrero. Curse of the Bambino? SHEEEEET! I won't go postal till I have all the awful details. I'm too old to really be giving a rat's ass about this stuff but I do. Damn Mets! < |